What do you say when people ask how you are?
More important, what’s the actual answer?
Finally, what would you like the answer to be?
You can direct your life so that most days are truly good ones.
Since your days are your most precious possessions, this would be a nice direction to take.
It comes down to what you mean by “a good day.”
If you are assessing the balance of pleasure and pain that your life is supplying that day, there will be a few truly good ones, but most will be a swirly mix.
If you average out the enjoyments and the torments you may most honestly come up with “okay” most of the time.
On the other hand, if you don’t average your experiences and respond out of the moment, you would supply an inventory of various emotions.
Emotionally, life is kind of like a car-wash.
Now I’m soaked, then I’m scrubbed raw, later I’m blown away, and another time I’m feeling quite shiny.
Is there another way to see life, which renders it good most of the time?
A much better option consists of finding out what matters to you and then pursuing it.
A good day, in this mindset, is a day during which you know what your missions in life currently are and when you are actively pursuing them.
It is not necessary to reach your objectives for your life to ride this groove, only to direct yourself toward them.
In fact, when you complete an important objective of your life, after celebrating a bit, you need to start looking for another one.
Some good news: even the act of searching for one’s purpose is a mission in itself.
Accordingly, whenever someone asks “how are you?” it becomes a reminder about your purpose and an opportunity to ask yourself if you are on track today.
It doesn’t even matter if they are listening to the answer, because you will be.
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Nice post, Dr. Rick! I like to think people care when they ask “how are you,” but the truth is that’s rarely what they’re really asking. I like that you turn it around on the person asked the question to decide the answer, whether or not the answer is truthfully divulged.
This weekend I was with a 102 year old woman, a friend’s mother, who still makes every day a good one. How? She feeds the chickens on her small farm, and shops for the groceries. Yes, she still drives. What keeps her going? She’s needed, by her daughter and her little chicks, so she has a mission. Doesn’t need to be a big objective, just an objective perhaps?
Yes, exactly — as long as it matters to us. Further, the small efforts we make often have big repercussions, whether or not we witness them.
Thanks!