Do you know about the Big Fist Theory?
It goes like this: invisible above you lingers a giant but quiet fist, just waiting for you to enjoy yourself.
As soon as your life takes an upturn, the fist awakens, crashing down to smash away your happiness.
Some people knowingly believe the Big Fist Theory, thinking that life (or at least their particular lives) excels in such a teasing torment.
More people would reject this overt notion, but react the same way anyway. How can you tell?
Whenever their circumstances improve, they begin to worry, as if bracing against the inevitable dashing of their hopes.
The comedian Lenny Bruce once suggested that you can do anything you want as long as you don’t enjoy it. Is this the cause of the prevalence of the Big Fist Theory?
Another, more likely, culprit is what you might call “misplaced humility.” When we are honest with ourselves, we are aware of our failings. So, perhaps we do not believe that we deserve good fortune.
Yet, this seems unfair, doesn’t it? After all, we also do many good things, but it may still be a challenge to face adversity with the confidence that we deserve better.
In this way, misplaced humility about oneself is an opinion worth challenging.
An even more likely cause of Big-Fist-Phobia is a phenomenon that could be termed “disappointment intolerance.” This is a holdover from childhood.
When we first learn about disappointment, we are not usually in control of our lives, so it can seem better to limit our hopes in order to avoid upset.
This belief needs updating, since hopefulness contributes to success in adulthood.
In fact, hopefulness is consistent with good planning. Accordingly, the classic motivational speaker Zig Ziglar famously suggested, “expect the best” and “prepare for the worst.”
Adults can suitably prepare in many ways. On the other hand, children often can best prepare for the worst by keeping their hopes modest.
It is now time to claim your adult right to unbridled hope.
Indeed, you can do anything you choose and fully enjoy the result. Just have a backup contingency plan ready, which is how you “prepare for the worst.”
This combination will allow for maximum motivation and best results. With the protection of a backup plan, no hope is too high.
To that end, I wrote the following a couple of days ago on a Facebook post, calling it a “winning formula”:
“Pick a challenge big enough that you will sometimes feel like quitting, and don’t.
Aim this venture high enough that sometimes you will think you can reach it, and other times you will think that you cannot.
During the second times, work even harder, pushing yourself enough that you do not have much time to think about failing.
After you achieve the next level, savor it and believe in it. Breathe it in. Then, aim higher.”
Notice the “savor” part – this is essential both for sustaining motivation and for further success.
When you build any vehicle of success, even a small one, you get to drive it somewhere. But, turn down the streets without Big Fists hovering – it’s a better ride.
Next week: a Big Fist Theory alternative: the Man and the Tiger
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