July 1, 2011: The worst thing you can say about yourself

Personal change

[Previously:  I identified how to perform an “instant analysis” of unwanted patterns of thought, actions, and feelings]

Rigid patterns vary, but the reaction to them is the same, at least in people  who are honest with themselves.   People feel stuck within the same repetitive responses as always, the ones that seldom help the situation.

During times of crisis, people tend to see themselves a “problematic,” because of they feel troubled by such automatic stress-patterns.

When we sort through stressful situations and their reactions to them, I help people separate the totality their lives from the problem area.  Then, rather than being a problem, they think that they may have problems.

As we understand the problem better, most individuals begin to see their problematic reaction as an old behavior pattern.

With more clarity,  we see that the rigid patterns are really old, outdated skills.  As we noted previously, they were the  best responses during the situations  in which they were learned.

Now the entire context of the old pattern has changed. It becomes clear that the worst thing that people can accurately say about themselves is that some of their old, patterned skills have become outdated.

Further, the reason the old skill is outdated is because they have succeeded in changing  the environments in which they live, so that the old patterns no longer fit.  If they still were stuck in situations similar to their childhoods, the old patterns would still match their lives’ needs.

At this point, I say “Congratulations!”

Next week:  how to know when you are stuck in a rigid and outdated response pattern.

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2 thoughts on “July 1, 2011: The worst thing you can say about yourself”

  1. I love how simply you put things. I see where I have been stopped in my life by my fears of making a mistake and how I was unaware except in retrospective of the circumstances as opportunities. I see that the filter or pattern that I look at life through had me play safe while looking like a risk taker.

    1. Dr. Rick Blum

      That’s a great example of the kinds of patterns we are looking at. When they are from childhood, it means that the current “mistake” is actually a previous solution.

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